Rising costs won’t stop me!

Illustration by Rebekah Hair

That’s right, man. I came back from the dead because all your complaining about rising housing costs got to me. Obviously, you forgot the life lessons I taught you in my riveting 1854 essay about how I built for practically nothing in the woods. Newsflash. You still don’t need contractors…

Don’t listen to Matilda!

Image: TriStar Pictures

“Buying a fake vaccination card is not a, quote, “serious crime.” It’s not even close to a serious crime. Buying a fake vaccination card is an act of desperation by decent, law-abiding Americans who have been forced into a corner by tyrants. You know what’s a serious crime? Forcing Americans…

Who needs reliable infrastructure when you have birds?

Image by ONYXprj on iStock

“Across this country, far too many communities are struggling with crumbling roads and structurally unsound bridges, outrageous congestion, lead-coated pipes and no broadband access. You don’t hold up a major priority of the country, and millions of jobs, as some form of leverage. The infrastructure bill is not a political…

Jottings from a very old mom-to-be

1st Month:

All illustrations by Rebekah Hair.

Hey there, baby!?!?!!? Totally thought I was going into perimenopause. But turns out — the night sweats, hot flashes, and moodiness were all you! They are going to do some extra monitoring because I’m a geriatric millennial and this is a geriatric pregnancy.

That means — take a…

Pay up or get out of the ark.

Image by Pink_frog on iStock

“Millions of households could face eviction over the next month — when lawmakers on are on their annual August recess — and some have predicted a full-blown eviction crisis, just as a surge in Covid cases from the highly contagious Delta variant may be prompting renewed calls for people to…

The mother was once dreaming of Africa.

Illustration by Dan Shultz

The mother looked forward to summer vacation. She thought of the homework struggle that happened every night. It was ugly like a bullfight. She did not want to supervise mathematics problems. She wanted to travel to golden beaches. She did not want to go over third-grade spelling. She wanted to…

Get back into the thrill of it!

The Vaccinator:

Climb to over 300 feet at a speed of 70 miles an hour. Get a dose of the COVID vaccine. Have your photo snapped at the top of the ride for convenient social media sharing. Scream because it’s summer again! Also because last year’s shorts are too tight. Or maybe…


A 2021 Congressional Fable

Image by Jim Larkin on iStock

“Congressional action on federal voting rights legislation must be the result of both Democrats and Republicans coming together to find a pathway forward or we risk further dividing and destroying the republic we swore to protect and defend as elected officials.” — Sen. Joe Manchin, D-W.Va …

You could really use some barbecue today because the hurricanes destroyed your kitchen? That’s too bad.

Photo by Evan Wise on Unsplash

“I want to be clear to folks in this region who are thinking about making that dangerous trek to the United States-Mexico border: Do not come. Do not come.” — Kamala Harris (Source: AP)

Hey there. Just stopping by to say hi. How’s the weather over there? It’s pretty sunny…

Rochelle Elana Fisher

Copywriter/Humorist. Read my mind @SlackjawHumor @PointsinCase @The_Belladonnas @DailyDrunkMag @littleoldlady__ Also copy in a 2006 era VIAGRA brochure.

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